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Jeannie, this line really struck me: "Ruminating over external 'flaws,' like crow’s feet or turkey neck or muffin tops, in my view, are ways we patch the deeper wounds we tend to hide inside of us." It's a really profound way to view ourselves, and I so appreciate you bringing into the light for me. XO

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Aug 30·edited Sep 4Author

Katrina, I always appreciate your thoughtful comments. I feel fulfilled to know when something I write offers a reader insight. ❤️

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Me too! I do this all the time to myself. I wish I didn't.

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Hugs, Doreen.

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Awwh, Thanks.

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Your description of the confusion you felt as a child when told to “watch your weight” made my inner child feel so seen. I wish I could hug young Jeannie and young Rachel and assure them that we are so much more than the container in which our beautiful hearts, minds, and souls reside. Thank goodness we know this now and can support each other as we shed the damaging beliefs that were imposed on us. My hand in yours.

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I agree, Rachel. Reading your reflections and participating in your tree house conversations have been vital to my healing journey. Thank you, friend. ❤️

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Your honesty about the "baggage of body shame" is so powerful. It's like we carry around these invisible weights, and they hold us back from seeing our own worth. I've been there, hiding behind baggy clothes and low self-esteem. Your journey towards self-acceptance is inspiring – it's a reminder that we deserve to feel comfortable and confident in our own skin.

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Alexander, your thoughtful comment means so much. I always feel honored when others share vulnerably with me their own journey. Thank you.

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This is a great article and I can relate to this. Though never “overweight” I had so many issues with eating and body image throughout my life. I still do, but these days I know how to control it and work through the issues constructively and not destructively

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I'm so grateful to hear this, Melissa!

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I really needed to read this today, Jeannie. Thank you for such a heartfelt, insightful post.

While I don't judge others for their appearances, I certainly have been judging myself harshly lately. A breast cancer survivor, I am grateful to be alive. But it's difficult to live with the scars all over my torso from massive surgeries and other treatments. I used to like the way my body looked, but now I've had so many negative feelings toward it. I wonder if the fact that all this was caused by the trauma of having had cancer has something to do with it. Maybe the scars are a reminder of when my body betrayed me. I'm not sure.

This post is beautifully written, like all your posts. Thank you for this.

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Thanks for what you shared, Beth. I think you're right that this can be a type of trauma. Bodily trauma is real and it affects us psychologically and emotionally. What you went through with breast cancer absolutely impacted the way you see yourself, your self image and identity. I would encourage you to explore that through private journaling, which might be very healing and insightful for you.

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Thank you Jeannie. I love to journal, so that will help.

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So courageous! So insightful! So beautiful! So wise! So inspiring! THANK YOU!

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Thank you, Jonathan!

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"Beautiful" post!!

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Thank you, Julie!

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I was a teenager in the late 70's and 80's and all I wanted was to have thin legs so I could fit into Jordache jeans. For a whole bunch of reasons I ended up with disordered eating, what helped me cure it was moving away from the U.S. I lived in the U.K. and saw plenty of women eating fried foods, sweets, drinking beer and not being stick thin. No one seemed to be having problems with finding someone who found them attractive, women nor men worked out obsessively. The change of culture allowed me to see how much emphasis Americans put on physical appearance and body image and how that affects us when we are young girls who then grow up to be women with body shame issues. I've been back in the U.S. for 32 years so some of the baggage rears it's ugly head now and again, especially as I'm getting older.

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That's a good point, Doreen, the way culture plays a roll in our body image.

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